Patty the Panther's new suit

Patty the Panther's vanity leads to her embarrassment

Act I

Patty the Panther lived in the woods near the lakehouse. Patty cared very much about how he looked. He was always making sure that his fur was clean and beautiful and his teeth were pearly white. The other animals thought that Patty was kinda silly, but they played along because they were afraid of him. He was ultimately a vicious and ruthless predator, living at the top of the local foodchain.

Rebecca the Raccoon and Seymore the Snake were two local ne'er-do-wells who were always looking for the next scam. They observed that Patty's vanity made him vulnerable. One day, Rebecca and Seymore approached Patty by the lake, as Patty was combing his fur and admiring his reflection. They told Patty about a tailor, just accross the river in Pennsylvania, who manufactured amazing animal clothes. Specifically, a beautiful coat that would fit a four-legged creature like Patty perfectly.

But that's not all. These coats had an amazing special property. Only those who were good enough, could see them. Anyone who was not worthy, wouldn't notice the coat at all.

Patty wanted nothing more than to be good enough, and better than others. He wanted this beautiful coat, he wanted to be sure that he was good enough to see it, and he wanted to know exactly who was not worthy. He had to have this coat!

Patty asked Rebecca and Seymore if they could help him get one of these amazing coats? Rebecca and Seymore were happy to agree. They made sure that Patty paid them in full, up front. Rebecca and Seymore then spent the weekend rafting, camping, and eating hot dogs in the Delaware River Gap.

Act II

When the next week rolled around, they found Patty again, cleaning his paws with some left over mouse bones. They approached Patty solemly, Rebecca with her arms outstretched, as if she were holding a heavy robe. They looked at Patty expectedly. Patty immediatley squealed with excitement. With great flourish, Patty made a show of putting on the invisible vestments. Patty turned around with pride, showing Rebecca and Seymore his most flattering angles. The Raccoon and the snake smiled, and gushed, complimenting Patty on his new clothes. None of the three even bothered to mention that they could see the clothes. Of course they could, they were all surely worthy.

Act III

Patty could hardly wait to show all of the other animals his beautiful new clothes. He imagined the way he would belittle anyone who could not see them. Patty could hardly sleep that night. The next morning Patty arose out of his den before sunrise, put on his new clothes, and went out into forest looking for animals to impress.

He saw many that morning. Each time he came upon someone he would say, "don't you like me new coat? Isn't it beautiful?"

And each time the animal would stare, confused, but ultimately decide to play along.

"Ya, sure Patty. Looking good bro"

Again, Patty was a viscious and ruthless predator, and none of the animals wanted to upset him.

A little while after lunch, Patty strolled by the foresthood school. All of the school-age animals were sitting in a circle near the spillway, listening to Rachel the Rabbit conduct a lesson about forest fires. Patty particularly liked Rachel the Rabbit. Everyone was quite fond of Rachel the Rabbit.

"Sup Rachel, what do you folks think of my amazing, new coat?' Patty said, turning around.

After a pause, Rachel started to mumble something, but then Fiona the Fox spoke up.

"You're wearing nothing dude! You haven't got on any coat. What's wrong with you Patty. Get a grip", Fiona said dismissively.

Then she turned her attention back to the lesson. Dolly the Dear let a muffled laugh escape. Then Penny the Porcupine giggled. Then it was a cascade of laughter. All of the children joined in to laugh at Patty. Even Rachel snickered. Other animals in the forest heard the commotion and joined in. Soon the entire forest had heard, and they all laughed at Patty.

Patty was furious. He snarled his teeth, arched his back, and ran off. He found Rebecca the Raccoon and Seymore the Snake lounging near the other side of the lake. He tore their bodies to shreds and ate them.